This week has been a hectic and emotional week. My Mother and I helped my Grandparents move from a town 3 hours away, to one 45 minutes from me.
This is something my Nan has wanted for almost a decade, if not longer. For one reason or another, my Pop always refused. She has essentially spent the last 10 years miserable, living in a town she loathed.
This week, she got her wish, except she wasn’t able to enjoy it like she should have.
Early this year she was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s.
As these thins go, it escalated quickly to the point now where she is repeating the same two stories without pause. I could go into the ways in which it is manifesting, but most of us have seen it at least once or heard stories.
The part of all of this that gets me, is that she was so completely lost and stressed throughout the entire move she couldn’t relax and get excited. When I asked her if she was excited her reply was “I would be if I knew where we were going”.
On the day, she was restless and irritable, argumentative and emotional. It was like watching a toddler getting ready for daycare.
She put her good rings away somewhere, didn’t tell anyone else, forgot where they were and became fixated on finding them. We managed to reassure her that if we couldn’t see them, they were packed somewhere and she calmed for a few minutes, before ‘remembering’ and the whole process would start again. Eventually she found them and relaxed a little, but then it was something else.
My point is, I wish for her that she had have done this years ago when she was lucid enough to not only understand what was happening, but enjoy the process and get as excited as Mum and I were.
Selfishly, I wish that it had happened when I was able to truly enjoy her company like I used to as a kid. We could watch movies and snuggle in the lounge. Go to Bingo or Housie or Alphie and she’d drive and play the pokies and give me half of her winnings. Drink cup after cup of tea or coffee and she’d tell me stories about her youth and the family. She’d cook me dinner and I’d feel like I was the most important person in the world.
Now, I don’t know what it is going to look like. I am lucky she still remembers who I am, and if you tell her a few times, she remembers what is going on around her.
Anyway, the point of this is, don’t put things off.
Do them today.
It is a cliche, but it is probably one of the few that shouldn’t be.
Don’t put off til tomorrow what you could do today.
Write that book. Climb that mountain. Run that marathon. Tell him you love him. Hug your kids. Go on that holiday. Get married. Watch the sunset over the Indian Ocean.
Whatever it is, just do it.
And enjoy it while you can.
Find the happiness and fun in every moment, that spoonful of sugar. Don’t go to bed angry. Use your energy for happiness and love, not hate. Be kind, to yourself and others. Be happy now.
You don’t know how many tomorrows you have.
And apparently, you don’t have to die for your time to be up.